A New Addition to the Family

My host mother is a 69 year old woman with diabetes and is the primary care giver for her grown children and grand children. She cooks all the meals every day for every member in her family, even those who no longer live in the house. She alone is responsible for maintaining a spotless house and doing all the laundry by hand for every one. It is an around the clock job that is very physically demanding and she is starting to get to the age where she needs some help. Instead of the husband or the live in sons lending a hand, my host mom has been talking about getting some hired help. The only problem she claims, is that it's hard to find good help these days. Meaning, you have to know and trust a person before you let them into your house. The past two helpers my host mom has had, allegedly stole. So she is constantly on the look out for a woman to help relieve some of the burden of cooking and cleaning.

One morning at the beginning of this week, I went down stairs for breakfast and there was a young lady standing in the kitchen. There are always friends and random family members in the house so I wasn't surprised. But as I was sitting at the kitchen table eating my breakfast of bread and avocado, I realized my host mom was explaining the preparation step by step. It became apparent that my host mom was training this girl to help around the house. I studied her face hard trying to get a guestimate on her age. She looked young and I was praying that she be at least 16 (16 is the age they graduate high school).

I struck up a conversation with her and asked how old she was. She was 12. I got a knot in the bottom of my stomach. Child labor is still very common in Peru and is something I am very opposed to. I did not know if I could live in a house that had a 12 year old scrubbing the bathroom and making my lunch. As we continued to talk, I learned that she had moved with her family from Ayacucho (a poor province up in the Andes) to Lurin two years ago. But because there were so many children in the family and her older sister was pregnant and the dad had left to find work, this girl was being neglected. An arrangement had been made that she, Sara, would move into our house and be fed and cared for in exchange for work.

I spent the rest of the day thinking about my values and if this situation was crossing one of my moral lines. In one aspect, our family was being kind and taking in a needy girl in the family, which is a beautiful act of kindness. But to what degree was she going to be made to work? Was she attending school and how much of a priority would her school work be?

The next morning I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth and Sara was cleaning the shower. I was really hating the situation. I worked all day that day and was tutoring until 10 at night. When I came home finally, my 34 year host brother was sitting at the table helping her with her homework. It was a bit of a relief to see the family supporting her school work. I ended up getting in on the study group as we attempted to tackle one of those ridiculous and impossibly hard junior high school assignments. We had to find words that ended with different letter combinations and I challenge any of you to find 5 Spanish words that end in B-L-U.

My host mom has also really embraced Sara. She loves having some one to talk with and adore her. It's also very surprising how happy Sara seems. She is a very sweet girl who always smiles and didn't need any transition time. She likes that I live there and that she is not the odd one out in the family. She is really beloved by all after just one week and I have dealt with the idea of her working around the house. In my old host family, there was 12 year old and a 15 year old. Both the girls helped around the house, cooking and cleaning. It's only natural to help out with chores. As long as she is not treated poorly and her studies stay a priority, I view this as a win win situation